Jokes

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Jokes
Topic Started: Oct 30 2008, 12:47 AM (699 Views)
Brianna	Mar 16 2010, 01:31 PM Post #21
Another pint? Posts: 3,919 Group: Admin Member #287 Joined: March 3, 2009 Favourite Player Jamie Carragher	A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam. The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed. 'Breast-fed,' she replied. 'Well, strip down to your waist,' the doctor ordered. She did He pinched her chest, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both for a while in a very professional and detailed examination. Motioning to her to get dressed, the doctor said, 'No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk.' 'I know,' she said, 'I'm his Grandma, but I'm glad I came!'



Brianna	Apr 7 2010, 10:59 PM Post #22
Another pint? Posts: 3,919 Group: Admin Member #287 Joined: March 3, 2009 Favourite Player Jamie Carragher	They say smoking is the hardest thing to stop... they obviously have never driven a Toyota =)



Ste_Macca	Apr 7 2010, 11:04 PM Post #23
I'm hungry. Where's the jam? Posts: 5,068 Group: Admin Member #1 Joined: October 30, 2008 Location Liverpool Twitter ID Ste_Macca Facebook ID people/Stephen-Fleetwood/555575793 Male ID male	The south of England will be quiet tonight ha ha.



Ste_Macca	May 19 2010, 10:09 PM Post #24
I'm hungry. Where's the jam? Posts: 5,068 Group: Admin Member #1 Joined: October 30, 2008 Location Liverpool Twitter ID Ste_Macca Facebook ID people/Stephen-Fleetwood/555575793 Male ID male	My wife asked me about the cut on my finger. "Oh, that," I said. "I was cutting up some string using the scissors." She said, "That was clumsy." I said, "Yeah. Anyway, are you looking forward to your sky dive tomorrow?"



Ste_Macca	May 19 2010, 10:11 PM Post #25
I'm hungry. Where's the jam? Posts: 5,068 Group: Admin Member #1 Joined: October 30, 2008 Location Liverpool Twitter ID Ste_Macca Facebook ID people/Stephen-Fleetwood/555575793 Male ID male	My boss just asked me to go to Woolworths to get him a tin of striped paint. I'm not falling for that though. Woolies closed down ages ago.



Brianna	Aug 10 2010, 05:19 PM Post #26
Another pint? Posts: 3,919 Group: Admin Member #287 Joined: March 3, 2009 Favourite Player Jamie Carragher	Cheey pick up line from a man: "What has 148 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My Zipper." For the record, that would only get you a slap, fellas haha



Brianna	Aug 13 2010, 10:35 AM Post #27
Another pint? Posts: 3,919 Group: Admin Member #287 Joined: March 3, 2009 Favourite Player Jamie Carragher	'My fat wife started crying because the airline made her book two seats. I said, "Yes, but you'll get two meals." That cheered her right up.'



i-love-gerrard	Aug 14 2010, 06:24 PM Post #28
Season Ticket Holder Posts: 712 Group: Members Member #222 Joined: February 8, 2009 Favourite Player Ian Rush Location Merseyside	Brianna Aug 13 2010, 10:35 AM 'My fat wife started crying because the airline made her book two seats. I said, "Yes, but you'll get two meals." That cheered her right up.' FUNNY
	Liverpool FC Rule


Brianna	Aug 15 2010, 09:36 PM Post #29
Another pint? Posts: 3,919 Group: Admin Member #287 Joined: March 3, 2009 Favourite Player Jamie Carragher	Husband says to wife "My olympic condoms have arrived, I think i'll wear Gold tonight". Wife says "Why don't you wear Silver and cum fuckin 2nd for a change?"



Ste_Macca	Sep 4 2011, 09:11 PM Post #30
I'm hungry. Where's the jam? Posts: 5,068 Group: Admin Member #1 Joined: October 30, 2008 Location Liverpool Twitter ID Ste_Macca Facebook ID people/Stephen-Fleetwood/555575793 Male ID male	A Spurs Fan, a Manchester United fan and a Liverpool fan are climbing a mountain and arguing about who loves their team the most..The Spurs fan insists that he is the most loyal and he yells,"this is for Tottenham!"and jumps off the mountain. Not to be out done, the Liverpool fan next professes his love for his team. He screams,"this is for the Kop! And pushes the Manchester United fan off the mountain.



Brianna	Dec 9 2011, 08:35 AM Post #31
Another pint? Posts: 3,919 Group: Admin Member #287 Joined: March 3, 2009 Favourite Player Jamie Carragher	A woman goes to a tattoo parlour and asks for a tattoo of Santa and 'Merry Christmas!' on her right thigh, and a bottle of champagne and 'Happy New Year!' on her left thigh. As she was leaving the tattoo artist asked her why she got such unusual tattoos. She replies "I'm sick and tired of my husband complaining that there's nothing good to eat between Christmas and New Year.



Dani	Dec 9 2011, 09:16 PM Post #32
Legend Posts: 756 Group: Members Member #114 Joined: January 24, 2009 Favourite Player Rush Location Merseyside Male ID Male Xbox ID DaniLFC	Brianna Dec 9 2011, 08:35 AM A woman goes to a tattoo parlour and asks for a tattoo of Santa and 'Merry Christmas!' on her right thigh, and a bottle of champagne and 'Happy New Year!' on her left thigh. As she was leaving the tattoo artist asked her why she got such unusual tattoos. She replies "I'm sick and tired of my husband complaining that there's nothing good to eat between Christmas and New Year.



Brianna	Dec 18 2011, 09:10 PM Post #33
Another pint? Posts: 3,919 Group: Admin Member #287 Joined: March 3, 2009 Favourite Player Jamie Carragher	Surely this is a joke...I laughed anyways! Attached to this post: missingkitten.jpg (22.82 KB)



booby	Jan 4 2012, 07:24 PM Post #34
Boobylicious Posts: 1,841 Group: Members Member #13 Joined: November 11, 2008 Favourite Player Kenny Dalglish Location Merseyside Female ID Female	Robbie Keane is looking for a short-term loan deal. Rumours suggest he would like to join his boyhood club, Anzhi Makhachkala.



Ste_Macca	Apr 6 2012, 11:55 AM Post #35
I'm hungry. Where's the jam? Posts: 5,068 Group: Admin Member #1 Joined: October 30, 2008 Location Liverpool Twitter ID Ste_Macca Facebook ID people/Stephen-Fleetwood/555575793 Male ID male	You never realise what you've got till it's gone. Toilet paper being a good example.



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